My one-year anniversary is coming up soon. No, not of a relationship or a work milestone, but my one-year anniversary of since I started the uphill battle of job hunting. It’s been nearly a year since I started seriously applying for jobs, and all I have to show for it is an “Open for Work” sign on my LinkedIn profile picture.
In one year, I’ve filled out 85 applications, reached out to 40 people on LinkedIn, and had 9 first-round interviews. Of those interviews, I made it to the final hiring stage four times, and every time, I was told that I was an excellent candidate but just not the right fit for the role. I’ve always tried to maintain an optimistic outlook on things. I have a master’s degree in journalism, a resume with five internship experiences and three big-girl jobs so to speak, led an award-winning social media campaign, and have never-ending colleagues who would vouch for me – I mean, I’m bound to be a highly desirable candidate, right? Apparently not.
Now, the job search is starting to feel more personal than it did before.
I was recently rejected from a dream job of mine. Every interview went well, and every time I was told that I “seemed like a great fit.” However, without fanfare or explanation, I received a rejection that stung me to my core. After two months of interviewing and a lengthy social media task, I was told they would not be moving forward with my application. In fact, no other candidate got the role, and they’d instead be restarting the hiring process. This rejection felt like the nail in the coffin of the career I’ve dreamed of and have worked so hard to pursue.
When you’re young, you’re sold the idea that if you work hard, get a degree, and play by the rules, then you’ll have the life you want. But, as you age, you start to realize that’s not always the case. I’ve spent the past few years pursuing a career in travel journalism. Yes, I admit that’s a tough road, and the massive media layoffs affecting 15,000 people in 2024 alone, aren’t helping, but still, I held on to the hope that it’s not an unreachable goal. In a giant risk, I quit my job as an associate writer at CNET to pursue my master’s of Arts and Lifestyle Journalism at the University of the Arts London.
At UAL, I interned at National Geographic Traveller, freelanced for The Sun (where I continue to freelance today), and made connections with other alumni. I left feeling more confident than ever in the possibility of finding a position at a travel publication. Six months later, my hope has begun to diminish, and I’m starting to wonder why I ever left CNET in the first place. Sure, it may not have been my dream job, but at least it was steady and paid well. In some ways, it feels as if I’ve taken one step forward and two steps back by giving up that role.
The hunt for a full-time salaried job feels as if it has taken everything I’ve worked so hard to build up. It’s taken my confidence in my abilities as a writer, a social media specialist, and as a person. Not having a consistent job consumes my every waking thought, and subconscious thought. Some nights I lie awake just stressing over how and when I’ll find a full time job that satisfies me not just financially but personally, too. It’s gotten to the point where I wake up in the middle of the night just to see if I heard back from a company regarding an application I submitted that day.
There are so many moments the past year that I’ve felt completely and utterly hopeless, and I’d be lying if I said that now isn’t one of those moments. However, when I’m about to give up or let my dreams go unfinished, I think of Billy Joel’s song “Piano Man.” What once was a carefree song I’d drunkenly sing at karaoke has turned into a warning of what life could look like if I quit now.
In the song, Joel sings about the various characters he met while playing the piano at a club in California. He talks about an old man who requests a song from his youth, a waitress with aspirations of a political career, and businessmen letting off steam. Each person is lonely and hopeful in their own way, but the one who sticks out to me the most is a man he calls John.
Joel sings:
Now, John at the bar is a friend of mine
He gets me my drinks for free
And he’s quick with a joke or to light up your smoke
But there’s some place that he’d rather be
He says, “Bill, I believe this is killing me”
As the smile ran away from his face
“But I’m sure that I could be a movie star
If I could get out of this place.”
John symbolizes everything Billy Joel is singing about, and quite honestly, what most unemployed people feel at this very moment: a dying hope and a sense of loneliness. John is what happens to most people who are told their dreams are unattainable or have been consistently rejected. Rather than continuing to pursue his passion, he’s stuck at a job he’s indifferent about, left with regret and thoughts of what could have been.
Nowadays, I fear my life may resemble John’s. But, there’s one big difference between John and me: he gave up all hope, and I haven’t. The job search so far may have left me worn out and bruised, but I refuse to let myself settle just yet. I’ll persevere despite my fear and will do everything in my power to keep the ball rolling.
Several of my friends have recently been laid off from their jobs, and they’ve spent months applying to roles for which they’re massively overqualified. However, we’ve remained persistent to make our childhood selves proud. Yes, that may mean working a serving job or something similar in the interim, but we’ve all kept our end goal in mind, and I implore others to do the same. There’s no telling how long the cursed “Open for Work” sign may stay on my profile, but I’m not ready to give up the fight just yet.
Written by Charlotte Maracina
About Charlotte
Charlotte Maracina is a freelance journalist with bylines in The Sun, Lonely Planet, National Geographic, and more. She recently moved back to her New York home after spending two years living in London, where she pursued her Master’s of Arts in journalism. She loves writing about travel, relationships, and all other lifestyle content. You can find her portfolio here!
