When I was younger every Christmas I would always think, “how could I ever miss out on Christmas with my family when I get married?” This Christmas has me asking another question, “how will I be splitting family time during the holidays with a new baby?” But what I’ve quickly realized is that now your partner’s family is your family too! So my first question was definitely a little easier to answer than my second one, but let me try and tackle that second one for you.
Everyone wants to see your baby, and the truth is you can feel torn or obligated to try and make it to every single holiday event. Thanksgiving is so short sweet and easy that it fools you into thinking splitting time between families is a breeze, but Christmas is a whole other beast. So how do you divide the time between in-laws during the busiest time of the year? Well, here are my tips on how to split family time and enjoy it.
Plan Ahead for Christmas
Remember how I said Thanksgiving will fool you, well you don’t have to let it. Plan ahead and ask in advance what the plans for Christmas are. My partner and I started asking about Christmas plans in November, yes it’s early but it’s necessary. This way we knew what December has in store for us. When you know what each family has planned, it will make it easier for you and your partner to make a plan that works best for you.
Remember You Can Say No
This month can feel overwhelming with the number of events you’re expected to attend. I know that sometimes it can feel like you can’t say no but remember you CAN. Everyone wants to see the baby but, sometimes you can’t make every commitment, and that’s okay, your family will understand. Remember that the family you came from is important but you need to do what’s best for your new family, the one you made.
50/50 Rule
I like to follow what I call the 50/50 rule. I believe in splitting the time 50/50 but also making sure the next year its flipped. So basically, I make sure that both sides get an even amount of time (if possible). Then the following year, it should be reversed. Basically, if you spend Christmas Eve and Christmas morning with your in-laws and Christmas afternoon and boxing day with your family. Then next year, you’ll reverse it, so it’s fair for you and your partner. Even though someone is sacrificing this year, it won’t feel like it. Also, all family members will get enough time to have snuggles and enjoy the new addition to your family.
Talk with Your Partner
This goes without saying, but sometimes we all need a little reminder. Discuss with your partner what they want to do but also how you’re feeling. Like I said above, the holidays are an overwhelming time. On top of that, you’ve got a new baby, discussing how you feel can help ease that holiday anxiety.
Holidays can be a stressful time, and not to mention all that stress from being a new mom and taking care of your new baby. Thinking about splitting family time during the holidays is the last thing you want to worry about. Holiday’s should be enjoyable, so use these tips to help you have a more relaxing Christmas. Remember, your family will understand whatever decision you make and will try to make plans that work with yours and the baby’s schedule. ALSO don’t spend time stressing about getting your gifts if you need, ideas check out Ana’s Five Unique Christmas Gift Ideas (here).
